Heart racing, I clicked out of Facebook and had a think. What benefit could allowing this man back into my life possibly have for me? On the other hand, I was settled and happy and a huge part of me wanted to show that off to the man that broke my heart.
My page was filled with pictures of Sam and I having fun, of me with girlfriends drinking, eating, shopping, reclining in hot tubs…it wouldn’t half show him how I’d moved on, wouldn’t it!
Then I realised an overwhelming curiosity to see what his life was like. Was he married? Kids? Living a life of luxury in London on masses of money from his high up job?
Oh gawd, I was already torturing myself with images of his fabulous life, his glamorous wife and his perfect children. I’d have bet he had a dog too. A Labrador – so good with kids, you know.
Taking a deep breath, I hit Ignore. The request disappeared and I was filled with a blend of regret and relief. DEFINITELY the right thing to do. Blimey – maybe I was growing up at last. I stretched out, feeling smug, and kicked the bag beneath my desk.
Ah. Maybe not quite grown up yet. The bag was empty. Its bright custard yellow shade and iconic logo enough to make sure that happened the moment I returned to the office after my shopping spree at Selfridges & Co last payday. The contents had gone home in a seemingly innocent H&M bag. No need to advertise the fact that I’d blown rather a large sum on THE MOST FABULOUS SHOES. Sophia Webster kitten heels. Okay, so a little bit retro, but…sorry, I digress.
My next dilemma – do I tell my wonderful Sam about Jamie’s Friend request?